Home Poker

Quiet, It's My Deal Now!
By Squeege

Wolpin calls the dealer a "God with a deck of cards". It's no lie. When it's a night of "dealer calls" poker, the cat with the cards is the most important cat at the table. It's not every table that plays "dealer calls". Some pick a standard game like stud or hold 'em and play only that in the course of the night. Even then, the dealer has some indisputable rights. But, those "dealer calls" games really give some stroke to the dealer.

The right to call the game. At this, the dealer can turn to the table for ideas, consider some suggestions, or even give the call to another player to make. But, the final decision belongs to the dealer. Everybody doesn't need to play it, but the next game dealt is the sole choice of the dealer.

The right to deal the cards. Yeah, it doesn't sound like a paradise, but I don't personally mind it. While dealing can be a chore for some, the point is that those cards belong to the dealer. The dealer is the only player who handles any card that has not been dealt to a player. This isn't to suggest free reign with the deck; the game's rules are always respected.

The right to call the hands. This is what separates the men from the boys. Any good at calling 'em while you deal 'em? No? Then, what good are you? "A cowboy for the cowboy!", "That club gets another!", "That hand is so bad, it's a foot!"

The right to keep the game moving. If the game is moving too slowly, it's the dealer's right to stomp his fist on the table and say to the distracted player, "Move it, you yahoo! How many cards do you want, already!"

The dealer is also allowed a great many other rights. Such as the right to keep the dummy hand in guts buried until showdown, and then, have the right himself to be the player that reveals the dummy hand to the table.

The point is that when one player picks up the deck as that round's dealer, it is the right of every other player to sit there and be dealt their hands. Everything else that has to do with the game belongs to the dealer, a real God with a deck of cards.

Of course, let's not deny the obvious. Alot of the things mentioned are not just rights, but responsibilities. Hey, if it's your deal, pick up the friggin' cards, hurry up and pick a game already, and deal 'em right. Oh great, nice going, dealer, wait-a-deal that one up. God Almighty, there's gotta be three thousand poker games, just pick one. Nobody likes a slow game, dealer, let's pick it up a little.

Yeah, I guess it's not all roses. Who cares? It's part of the game. The rights (and responsibilities) of the dealer are ingrained in the fabric of home poker play. It's irreplaceable.

Adapted from HomePoker.com